Why do all these list posts need an intro?

I’ll just leave you with this quote from Eminem:

“Fuck an intro.”

1) They take responsibility.

Some people think it’s “harder” to take responsibility, and “easier” to blame other people.

Really? Is it? So it’s “easier” to blame other people, even though blaming other people will never, ever get you what you want?

Doesn’t sound too “easy” to me.

Taking responsibility is liberating because you realise that you can actually do something about it.

I blamed a lot of other people when I first started writing because my posts weren’t accepted into their publications. I thought I knew better than them. I thought I “deserved” to be featured in their publication because I was clearly good enough.

Well, clearly, I wasn’t. And it was only once I took responsibility that I started to write more, and write smarter, and just become better.

That’s “easier” than blaming others.

2) They’re kind instead of nice.

The word “nice” has roots in the following:

· Foolish

· Stupid

· Senseless

· Careless

· Clumsy

· Weak

· Poor

· Needy

· Ignorant

· Unaware

The word “kind” has roots in the following:

· Deliberately doing good to others

· Innate

· Natural

· Compassionate

· Loving

· Full of tenderness

I know which list I prefer.

And I know which list I prefer to practice on myself.

3) They know their beliefs aren’t real.

I want you to think about your most important belief. One that guides your life. One that you lean on when you need something to lean on.

I want you to remove it from your head. I want you to hold it in your hand. I want you to close that hand.

Now, open that hand. What’s in that hand?

Your belief, right?

Nope.

There’s nothing in your hand.

Your most important belief, the belief that guides you, the belief you lean on… it’s not real.

So… why does it seem so hard to let go of them sometimes? Why does it seem so hard to change? Why wouldn’t we just let go and take on different beliefs all the time, depending on what we need?

What about the beliefs that aren’t useful to you? What’s stopping you from letting them go?

A belief that you need them?

4) They don’t take their results personally.

Some of my writing gets read by thousands of people. Some gets read by hundreds. Some gets read by tens. Some gets read by a few. Some doesn’t get read at all.

What would happen if I took all of that personally? I’d be exhausted. I’d be forever up and down and then up again and then down again and… man. That’s unsustainable.

Any feedback I get isn’t about me because it’s about my work. And I’m separate from my work.

And knowing I’m separate from my work allows me to learn from the negative things people say. It allows me to become a better writer. It allows me to become a better person.

5) They know they need certainty and uncertainty.

Humans need certainty and uncertainty. This is a fact.

Too much certainty = boredom.

Too much uncertainty = anxiety.

It’s good to be certain about your health, about your relationships, about your finances.

But imagine being certain about every single minute of every single day of your entire life. How boring would that be? How depressing would that be?

We need both.

6) They know they’re more than their thoughts.

You’re the one who experiences your thoughts. You’re the one who hears them. You’re the one who can control them.

So… you must be something else. Something different. Something more.

That means that you’re not required to do whatever your thoughts wish for you to do. You don’t have to obey them. They’re not in charge — you are. The real you.

It’s like this quote from Michael A. Singer, author of The Surrender Experiment and The Untethered Soul:

“The day you decide you are more interested in being aware of your thoughts than you are in the thoughts themselves — that is the day you will find your way out.”

7) They know they’re more than their feelings.

Same thing as being more than your thoughts.

Your feelings aren’t there to tell you how to act, and they’re not there to tell you whether or not to act at all. They’re there to tell you what’s important to you.

I have another quote for you, this time from Victor Frankl, author of Man’s Search For Meaning:

“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.”

8) They know what’s important to them.

When I first wrote everything down that was important to me — with the help of a mentor — and put it in order from most important to least important, and wrote down why these things were important to me, I looked at my list and had this thought: “that’s me.”

Do you know how encouraging that is? How freeing? How much confidence it gave me? And yet people will find all sorts of excuses to not do this, even though the whole thing takes less time than watching an episode of something on Netflix.

I did this with a friend recently. He wrote down everything that was important to him — not to his parents, or to his friends, or what he thought should be important to him — and we put it in order, and we talked about why those things were important to him.

He looked at his list and said this to me:

“Oh my god… I know why I’m not happy.”

So he changed. Now he’s happy.

It’s not “a lot more complicated” than that.

9) They live by what’s important to them.

If you know what’s important to you, but still refuse to live by what’s important to you… that’s going to hurt.

I know it hurts because it’s exactly what I did.

It’s exactly what I did because I still valued other people’s opinions of me over my own. Not random people though. The people closest to me.

I still thought I needed their permission. Their approval. I still thought they needed to wholeheartedly and enthusiastically and irrevocably support my every decision.

It was only when I got tired of my own bullshit, and tired of still not living the life I kept daydreaming about, that I actually changed.

Be grateful if you’re finally getting tired of your own bullshit.

10) They never waste a perfectly good mistake.

I learned this from Michael Houlihan and Bonnie Harvey, the entrepreneurs behind one of the biggest wine brands in the world — Barefoot Wine. They say that there’s no excuse for wasting a perfectly good mistake, because every mistake is beautiful, because now you’ve got the opportunity to never make the same mistake again.

Never making the same mistake again is real self-awareness. It’s funny though — it’s another one of those things that people say is “hard”. It’s “hard” to admit to your own mistakes. But… is it? Because what’s the alternative? Making the same mistake over and over and over and never moving forward and never becoming who you know you could be?

Does that sound “easier?”

11) They live in reality.

I really wanted to just quit my 9–5. Even though I had no savings and hadn’t started making any money on the side. I didn’t care about that because I hated my job so much and I just wanted to escape.

I didn’t want to live in reality, because the reality was that I couldn’t just quit. And that reality was painful. More painful than I’d be able to handle, I thought. So I just complained and sulked and took no action.

I didn’t want to accept my reality because wouldn’t that be admitting defeat? If I accepted it… then what? Where would my drive go? Didn’t I have to hate where I wanted to be to get to where I wanted to go?

No. Another myth.

It was only when I totally accepted that I wasn’t where I wanted to be — when I stopped judging myself for not being where I wanted to be — that I started working to get to where I wanted to be.

It’s only when you accept your reality — no matter how much you think you don’t like it — that you can change it.

12) They know that their opinion of who they are is more important than anyone else’s opinion of who they are.

If other people’s opinions of you are more important to you than your own… then how can you expect to live a life that’s true to you? How can you expect to ever stop worrying about what other people think of you? How will you ever feel free?

Do you think your opinion of someone else should be more important than that person’s opinion of themselves? I doubt it. And yet… it’s somehow ok for other people’s opinions of you to be more important to you than your own?

Other people are allowed to be who they are, but you have to be who other people want you to be?

13) They know they’re allowed to put themselves first.

If I asked you to write down a list of the important people in your life, would you write your own name?

If so, where would you write it? Right at the top? In the middle? At the bottom?

When I put other people above me is when I lived by their expectations instead of my own. It’s when I wanted their approval, their permission, their support. Actually, it’s not when I wanted it. It’s when I needed it. Well, when I believed I needed it.

And because I needed it… when I didn’t get it, I didn’t do the thing I wanted their permission to do.

That means I didn’t get what I wanted to get. All I got was frustration, and annoyance, and unhappiness.

Because I didn’t think it was ok to put myself first.

You have no control over other people so how can it be ok to put anybody else at the top of your list?

How can they be more important to you than you are?

14) They know that success can never be overrated.

A girl said this to me on a date:

“Success is overrated.”

Erm.

Ok.

How can success be overrated?

I guess if you think of success as money, or things, or achievements… then yeah, maybe.

But that’s not what success is. Success is individual. Success is whatever success is to you.

For me, success is choice. Which is similar and different to freedom.

Success is being able to take the time to work hard when I want to. It’s when I’m able to take on a new project. It’s when I’m able to take a day off. It’s when I take an evening off to go watch an NBA game (I need to move to the US first). It’s when I can go on holiday with my (future) wife. It’s when I can pick my kids up from school and take them to basketball practice or chess club or ballet lessons or whatever it is they want to do.

Maximum choice = maximum success.

15) They know the difference between “very” and “too”.

If you believe you’re very scared to do something, you leave yourself open to doing it.

If you believe you’re too scared to do something, you’ll never do it.

What story do you tell yourself?

16) They know they can’t become who they are if they’re scared to learn from who they’ve been.

There have been times in your life when you’ve been all of who you really are.

What could you learn from that? The least you could learn is that you can be all of who you really are.

There have been times in your life when you haven’t been who you are.

What could you learn from that?

You could learn about what holds you back. You could learn about who you hold back around. You could learn about what makes you think pretending to be someone you’re not is a better option than being the real you.

Wouldn’t learning about those things help you to become you?

17) They know it’s less about “how to” and more about “what’s stopping me”.

I get asked a lot of “how to” questions.

How to stop procrastinating, how to stay motivated, how to get over my ex.

All of them have the same answer: figure out why you’re doing it, and then stop doing it. And you probably won’t even need to “stop” — figuring out why is usually enough to stop.

But, of course, that’s not the answer people want. They already know that answer. So they need more.

Asking “what’s stopping me” questions can be scarier because they go deeper. “How to” questions are surface questions. They’re easy to answer. But “what’s stopping me” questions give answers like “because I’m scared” or “because I don’t want to” or “because I don’t know if I can”.

Admitting to those, confronting those… that’s self-awareness.

18) They don’t turn one problem into two.

I do this way too often. Like when I’m driving and someone cuts me up. Or pulls out in front of me. Or is going too fucking slow.

They do these things and I get angry. Or pissed off. Or frustrated.

Why though? What good does it do? Do I think that’s going to somehow resolve the situation?

Surprisingly, it never does. Me getting angry at the person in front never makes them go faster. Who’da thought!

The first problem was the person in front of me driving slowly. Depending on how you define “problem”.

The second problem was me getting angry about the first.

Which of those is out of my control? Which of those is within my control?

There’s no need to turn one problem into two.

19) They know it’s not wrong to feel bad.

Brené Brown said it best: we can’t selectively numb emotions.

If you numb sadness, you numb happiness. We can’t have true happiness without true sadness. Believing anything else means not believing in reality.

How many times do you hold back from really feeling? How many times do you feel sad, but then stop yourself? How many times do you try your best to avoid feeling sad?

Avoiding feeling sad is the same as avoiding feeling happy. Because if you don’t let yourself feel one, you’ll never feel the other. Not really. Not truly.

It’s not wrong to feel bad.

We’ve just decided that it is.

20) They don’t waste time failing at what they don’t want.

Is there a bigger waste of time than failing at what you don’t want? I suppose continuing to fail at what you don’t want is even worse… and yet how many of us do that?

How many of us settle for that pain, rather than the pain of failing at something we do want? Even though I don’t think any sane person would argue that the pain of the latter is infinitely more worthwhile.

It’s just like Jim Carrey said:

“You can fail at what you don’t want. So you might as well take a chance on doing what you love.”

How simple.

21) They know there’s only one common denominator in all of their relationships.

If you’ve ever said “why are all women [x]” or “why are all men [x]”, then I have some news for you: it’s not them.

It’s you.

Have you ever realised that you’re the one who’s picking these people? That you’re the one who’s choosing to spend time with them? That you’re the one who’s choosing these particular people to get to know better?

I only know this because this is exactly what I was like. And I still don’t think I’m completely past it.

All the women I’d been with and were dating seemed to be “complicated” or “flakey” or “not sure about what they wanted”.

I was convinced that this was true. That all women were just like this. I never even considered, never even thought, not for a moment, that maybe, just maybe… it had something to do with me.

Because of course it couldn’t be me! How could it possibly have been me? It was them! Their fault!

No.

False.

And let’s just say that was true. It’s not, but let’s say it was. Let’s say it was all their fault. How does that help? Is that a useful belief?

Or is it a more useful belief to actually look within and understand why I’m choosing who I’m choosing?

22) They don’t say the word “don’t”.

Don’t think of a blue tree.

Yeah. Exactly.

The unconscious mind can’t handle the word “don’t”. Because “don’t think of a blue tree” essentially means “think of ANYTHING other than a blue tree.

Anything? Anything at all? That’s almost infinity things. It’s actually infinity minus one — the blue tree.

Because choosing from almost infinity things is somewhat difficult, the mind goes in the one direction you’ve given it: the blue tree.

So.

How many times have you thought something similar to the following:

“DON’T mess up.”

“DON’T think about that.”

Or even…

“I DON’T want to fail.”

I don’t want to fail. Where do you think the mind does when you think that?

I know where it goes.

But don’t believe me.

23) They’re grateful to the people who’ve been a part of their life.

Every person who’s been in your life — every person who’s loved you, who’s liked you, who’s disliked you, who’s hurt you, who’s deliberately hurt you — they’ve all impacted you.

They’ve all helped to make you who you are.

The only way you won’t be grateful for that is if you don’t like who you are.

And self-aware people always like who they are.

24) They know they’ve already been who they really are.

There has been at least one time in your life when you’ve been who you really are. There have probably been many times. I hope there have. But there’s definitely been at least one time.

One time where you’ve made a decision completely for you. Where other people’s opinions just didn’t seem to matter. When you knew with your whole heart that it was just the right thing.

How did it feel? Good, right? And that’s an understatement.

So… what’s stopping you from doing it more often? What’s causing you to hold back from feeling that good again? Why are you pretending to be something you aren’t?

Because real self-awareness is so much more than knowing who you are.

It’s being who you are.

It reminds me of the biggest regret of the dying:

“I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected me of.”

That still gets me every time I read it.

I tried to work out exactly why it got me for a while. And I couldn’t. I’d just get emotional. But I think I have it now.

It gets me because the regret has nothing to do with not knowing how to live a life true to themselves. It has everything to with knowing exactly how, but lacking the courage to do it.

They knew who they were. They knew what they wanted. They knew what kind of life they wanted.

And yet… they made different choices. Because they thought they had to fulfil the expectations of others.

That is heartbreaking.

And sort of ironic. If they lived their life based on the expectations of other people, what did they think the other people were doing? Those other people were probably doing the same — living by the expectations of a group of different “other people”. And then THOSE other people… and on and on it goes.

We all know who we are.

Maybe it’s time to stop pretending we don’t.

Hope you liked this article, if you did then feel free to share it or support my work either through a Donation via Paypal or through Patreon, thank you!

P.S. If you liked this post then you’ll like my books as well. You can get them on Amazon.

30 Behaviors That Will Make You Unstoppable

A lot of people are good at what they do. Some are even elite. A select few are completely unstoppable.

Those who are unstoppable are in their own world. They don’t compete with anyone but themselves. You never know what they will do — only that you will be forced to respond. Even though they don’t compete with you, they make you compete with them.

Are you unstoppable? By the end of this blog you will be.

Let’s get started:

1. Don’t think — know and act.

“Don’t think. You already know what you have to do, and you know how to do it. What’s stopping you?” — Tim Grover

Rather than analyzing and thinking, act. Attuned to your senses, and with complete trust in yourself, do what you instinctively feel you should. As Oprah has said, “Every right decision I have ever made has come from my gut. Every wrong decision I’ve made was the result of me not listening to the greater voice of myself.”

The moment you start thinking, you’ve already lost. Thinking swiftly pulls you out of the zone.

2. Always be prepared so you have the freedom to act on instinct.

“Just as the yin-yang symbol possesses a kernel of light in the dark, and of dark in the light, creative leaps are grounded in a technical foundation.” — Josh Waitzkin

Become a master of your craft. While everyone else is relaxing, you’re practicing and perfecting. Learn the left-brained rules in and out so your right brain can have limitless freedom to break the rules and create.

With enhanced consciousness, time will slow down for you. You’ll see things in several more frames than others. While they’re trying to react to the situation, you’ll be able to manipulate and tweak the situation to your liking.

3. Don’t be motivated by money or anything external.

Having nice things is, well, nice. But for you, it’s never been about the money, prestige or anything else outside of you. Take these things away and nothing changes for you. You’re still going to be pushing your personal limits and giving it your all. Give these things to you and they won’t destroy you like they do most people.

4. Never be satisfied.

“The drive to close the gap between near-perfect and perfect is the difference between great and unstoppable.” — Tim Grover

Even after you achieve a goal, you’re not content. For you, it’s not even about the goal. It’s about the climb to see how far you can push yourself.

Does this make you ungrateful? Absolutely not. You’re entirely humbled and grateful for everything in your life. Which is why you will never get complacent or lazy.

To quote Jim Rohn, “the way to enjoy life best is to wrap up one goal and start right on the next one. Don’t linger too long at the table of success, the only way to enjoy another meal is to get hungry.”

5. Always be in control.

Unlike most people, who are dependent on substances or other external factors, you are in control of what you put in your body, how you spend your time and how long you stay in the zone.

Act based on instinct, not impulse. Just because you could doesn’t mean you do. And when you do, it’s because you want to, not because you have to.

6. Be true to yourself.

Although 70 percent of US employees hate their jobs and only one in three Americans report being happy, relentless and unstoppable people purge everything from their life they hate.

Have the self-respect and confidence to live life on your terms. When something isn’t right in your life, change it. Immediately.

7. Never let off the pressure.

“Pressure can bust pipes, but it also can make diamonds.” — Tim Grover

Most people can handle pressure in small doses. But when left to their own devices, they let off the pressure and relax.

Not you. You never take the pressure off yourself. Instead, you continuously turn-up the pressure. It’s what keeps you alert and active.

8. Don’t be afraid of the consequences of failure.

Most people stay close to the ground, where it’s safe. If they fall, it won’t hurt that bad. But when you choose to fly high, the fall may kill you. And you’re OK with that. To you, there is no ceiling and there is no floor. It’s all in your head. If something goes wrong — if you “fail” — you adjust and keep going.

9. Don’t compete with others. Make them compete with you.

Most people are competing with other people. They continuously check-in to see what others in their space (their “competition”) are doing. As a result, they mimic and copy what’s “working.”

Conversely, you’ve left all competition behind. Competing with others makes absolutely zero sense to you. It pulls you from your authentic zone. So you zone out all the external noise and instead zone in to your internal pressure to produce.

10. Never stop learning.

Ordinary people seek entertainment. Extraordinary people seek education and learning. When you want to become the best at what you do, you never stop learning. You never stop improving and honing your skills and knowledge.

Your unparalleled preparation is what gives you power. No one else is willing to pay the price you’ve paid.

11. Success isn’t enough — it only increases the pressure.

For most people, becoming “successful” is enough. However, when you’re relentless, success only increases the pressure to do more. Immediately following the achievement of a goal, you’re focused on your next challenge.

12. Don’t get crushed by success.

“Success can become a catalyst for failure.” — Greg McKeown

Most people can’t handle success, authority or privilege. It destroys them. It makes them lazy. When they get what they want, they stop doing the very things that got them there. The external noise becomes too intense.

But for you, no external noise can push harder than your own internal pressure. It’s not about thisachievement, but the one after, and the one after that. There is no destination. Only when you’re finished.

13. Completely own it when you screw up.

“Implementing extreme ownership requires checking your ego and operating with a high degree of humility. Admitting mistakes, taking ownership and developing a plan to overcome challenges are integral to any successful team.”―Jocko Willink

No blame. No deception or illusion. Just the cold hard truth. When you mess up, you own it. And as the leader, you own it when your team fails. Only with extreme ownership can you have complete freedom and control.

14. Let your work speak for itself.

“Well done, is well said.” — Anthony Liccione

Cal Newport’s recent book, Deep Work, distinguishes “deep work” from “shallow work.” Here’s the difference:

Deep work is:

• Rare
• High value
• And non-replicable (i.e., not easy to copy/outsource)

Shallow work is:

• Common
• Low value
• Replicable (i.e., anyone can do it)

Talking is shallow. Anyone can do it. It’s easily replicated. It’s low value. Conversely, deep work is rare. It’s done by people who are focused and working while everyone else is talking. Deep work is so good it can’t be ignored. It doesn’t need words. It speaks for itself.

15. Always work on your mental strength.

“Mental resilience is arguably the most critical trait of a world-class performer, and it should be nurtured continuously. Left to my own devices, I am always looking for ways to become more and more psychologically impregnable. When uncomfortable, my instinct is not to avoid the discomfort but to become at peace with it. My instinct is always to seek out challenges as opposed to avoiding them.” — Josh Waitzkin

The better you can be under pressure, the further you’ll go than anyone else. Because they’ll crumble under pressure.

The best training you will ever do is mental training. Wherever your mind goes, your body follows. Wherever your thoughts go, your life follows.

16. Confidence is your greatest asset.

You’ve heard it before: Running a marathon is far more mental than physical. A person’s ability to run a marathon — or do anything hard — is more a reflection of their level of confidence than their actual ability.

Your confidence determines:

• The size of challenges/goals you undertake
• How likely you will achieve those goals
• How well you bounce back from failures

If you’re not confident, you will never put yourself out there in the first place. When you’re confident, you don’t care how many times you fail, you’re going to succeed. And it doesn’t matter how stacked the odds seem against you.

17. Surround yourself with people who remind you of the future, not the past.

When you surround yourself with people who remind you of your past, you’ll have a hard time progressing. This is why we get stuck in certain roles, which we can’t break free from (e.g., the fat kid or shy girl).

Surrounding yourself with people who you want to be like allows you a fresh slate. You’re no longer defined by your past, only the future you are creating.

18. Let things go, but never forget.

Being unstoppable requires carrying no unnecessary mental or emotional baggage. Consequently, you’ll need to immediately and completely forgive anyone who has wronged you. However, forgiveness doesn’t mean you forget. And it doesn’t mean you have to do further business with those who have wronged you.

19. Have clear goals.

“While a fixation on results is certainly unhealthy, short-term goals can be useful developmental tools if they are balanced within a nurturing long-term philosophy.” — Josh Waitzkin

According to loads of psychology research, the most motivating goals are clearly defined and time-bound.

Your goals can either be focused on your behaviors (e.g., I’m going to write 500 words per day) or on the outcomes you’re seeking (e.g., I’m going to get published on The New York Times by June 1, 2016).

For most people, behaviorally-focused goals are the better and more motivating option. But when you crave the results so much that the work is irrelevant, your aim should be directed straight at the outcomes you want. However, results-focused goals are better when short-term and grounded in your long-term vision and philosophy. When your why is strong enough, the how will take care of itself.

20. Respond immediately, rather than analyzing or stalling.

“He who hesitates is lost.” — Cato

Anticipation of an event is always more extreme than the event itself — both for positive and negative events.

Just do it. Train yourself to respond immediately when you feel you should do something. Stop questioning yourself. Don’t analyze it. Don’t question if it came from God or from yourself. Just act.

You’ll figure out what to do after you’ve taken action. Until you take action, it will all be hypothetical. But once you act, it becomes practical.

21. Choose simplicity over complication.

“If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.” — Albert Einstein

It’s easy to be complicated. Most of the research and jargon in academia and business is over-complicated.

Cutting to the core and hitting the truth is hard, because it’s simple. As Leonardo da Vinci has said, “Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.”

Very few people will give you the truth. When you ask them a question, it gets mighty complicated. “There are so many variables” or “It depends” they say.

T. S. Eliot said it best, “Where is the wisdom we have lost in knowledge? Where is the knowledge we have lost in information?”

Wisdom is timeless and simple. Learn wisdom and choose it.

22. Never be jealous or envious of someone else’s accomplishments.

Being unstoppable means you genuinely want what’s best for everyone — even those you would consider your competitors. Jealousy and envy are the ego — which operates out of fear.

The reason you are happy for other people’s success is because their success has nothing to do with you.

You are in control of you. And you are different from every other person. There is no one who can do exactly what you can do. You have your own superpower with your own unique ability to contribute. And that’s what you’re going to do.

23. Take the shot every time.

“If I fail more than you, I win.” — Seth Godin

You miss every shot you don’t take. And most people don’t want to take the shot. Fear of failure paralyzes them.

The only way you can become unstoppable is if you stop thinking about it. Just take the shot. Don’t do it only when it’s convenient or when you feel ready. Just go and make whatever adjustments you need after the fact.

24. Don’t get caught up in the results of your success. Always remain focused on what got you those results: the work.

When you start doing noteworthy stuff, there are benefits that can become distractions. It can get easy to “ride the wave” of your previous work. Keep practicing. Perfect your craft. Never forget what got you here.

25. Think and act 10X.

“When 10X is your measuring stick, you immediately see how you can bypass what everyone else is doing.” — Dan Sullivan

Most people — even those you deem to be “world class” — are not operating at 10X. In truth, you could surpass anyone if you radically stretch your thinking and belief system.

Going 10X changes everything. As Dan Sullivan has said, “10X thinking automatically takes you ‘outside the box’ of your present obstacles and limitations.” It pulls you out of the problems most people are dealing with and opens you to an entirely new field of possibilities.

When you take your goal of earning $100,000 this year and change it to $1,000,000, you’re forced to operate at a different level. The logical and traditional approach doesn’t work with 10X. As Shane Snow, author of Smartcuts: How Hackers, Innovators, and Icons Accelerate Success,has said, “10x progress is built on bravery and creativity instead. Working smarter.”

The question is: Are you willing to go there? Not just entertain the thought for a second or two and then revert back to common thinking. No. Are you willing to sit with 10X thinking? Are you willing to question your own thought processes and open yourself to believing an entirely different set of possibilities?

Could you convince yourself to believe in your 10X potential? Are you willing to undertake goals that seems lunacy, to you and everyone else? Are you willing to take the mental leap, trusting “the universe will conspire to make it happen”?

26. Set goals that far exceed your current capabilities.

“You need to aim beyond what you are capable of. You need to develop a complete disregard for where your abilities end. If you think you’re unable to work for the best company in its sphere, make that your aim. If you think you’re unable to be on the cover of TIME magazine, make it your business to be there. Make your vision of where you want to be a reality. Nothing is impossible.” — Paul Arden

If your goals are logical, they won’t force you to create luck. Being unstoppable means your goals challenge you to be someone more than you currently are. As Jim Rohn has said, “Don’t wish it was easier, wish you were better.”

27. Make time for recovery and rejuvenation.

“Wherever you are, make sure you’re there.” — Dan Sullivan

When you focus on results, rather than being busy, you’re 100 percent on when you’re working and 100 percent off when you’re not. This not only allows you to be present in the moment, but it allows you the needed time to rest and recover.

Your ability to work at a high level is like fitness. If you never take a break between sets, you won’t be able to build strength, stamina and endurance. However, not all “rest” produces recovery. Certain things are more soothing than others.

Recovering from my work generally consists of writing in my journal, listening to music, spending time with my wife and kids, preparing and eating delicious food, or serving other people. These things rejuvenate me. They make my work possible, but also meaningful.

28. Start before you’re ready.

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” — Chinese Proverb

Most people wait. They believe they can start after they have enough time, money, connections and credentials. They wait until they feel “secure.” Not people who are unstoppable.

Unstoppable people started last year. They started five years ago before they even knew what they were doing. They started before they had any money. They started before they had all the answers. They started when no one else believed in them. The only permission they needed was the voice inside them prompting them to move forward. And they moved.

29. If you need permission, you probably shouldn’t do it.

A mentor of mine is a highly successful real estate investor. Throughout his career, he’s had hundreds of people ask him if they should “go into real-estate.”

He tells every one of them the same thing: that they shouldn’t do it. In fact, he actually tries talking most of them out of it. And in most cases he succeeds.

Why would he do that? “Those who are going to succeed will do so regardless of what I say,” he told me.

I know so many people who chase whatever worked for other people. They never truly decide what they want to do, and end up jumping from one thing to the next — trying to strike quick gold. And repetitively, they stop digging just a few feet from the gold after resigning the spot is barren.

No one will ever give you permission to live your dreams.

30. Don’t make exceptions.

Zig Ziglar used to tell a story of traveling one day and not getting in bed until 4 a.m. An hour and a half later (5:30), his alarm went off. He said, “Every fiber of my being was telling me to stay in bed.” But he had made a commitment, so he got up anyway. Admittedly, he had a horrible day and wasn’t productive at all.

Yet, he says that decision changed his life. As he explains:

“Had I bowed to my human, physical, emotional and mental desire to sleep in, I would have made that exception. A week later, I might have made an exception if I only got four hours of sleep. A week later, maybe I only got seven hours of sleep. The exception so many times becomes the rule. Had I slept in, I would’ve faced that danger. Watch those exceptions!”

Hence, Zig was unstoppable.

Conclusion

“From this point, your strategy is to make everyone else get on your level, you’re not going down to theirs. You’re not competing with anyone else, ever again. They’re going to have to compete with you. From now on, the end result is all that matters.” — Tim Grover

When you’re unstoppable, you will make sure to get what you want. Everything you need to know is already within you. All you need to do is trust yourself and act.

Are you unstoppable?

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9 Powerful Habits That Will Boost Your Confidence

How to destroy self-doubt and replace it with unshakable self-belief.

Whether you’re a small-business owner or the COO of Facebook, self-doubt can creep up and hold you back. It’s even become a full-blown syndrome, dubbed Impostor Syndrome, and it can make the best of us wonder if our fantastic abilities and contributions are real or if we’ve been faking it the whole time.

Learning how to evaporate that self-doubt will allow you to keep having your best traits shine, and boost your success and leadership in the process.

Here’s how some incredibly successful people overcame their feelings of self-doubt, and you can, too:

Keep it about the work

Even former President Barack Obama admits to battling moments of deep uncertainty in the course of his career.

“If you’re worrying about yourself — if you’re thinking, ‘Am I succeeding? Am I in the right position? Am I being appreciated?’ — then you’re going to end up feeling frustrated and stuck. But if you can keep it about the work, you’ll always have a path. There’s always something to be done.”

Trust your own voice

Ursula Burns, the first African American female CEO of a Fortune 500 company, found that staying true to her own individual vision and voice offered a way to tackle self-doubt when she felt out of place:

“I realized I was more convincing to myself and to the people who were listening when I actually said what I thought, versus what I thought people wanted to hear me say.”

If you present your best ideas and provide value, you can feel confident that you aren’t fooling anyone and that you do deserve every bit of success that comes your way.

Bye-bye, comfort zone

Leadership expert Brian Tracy once said, “You can only grow if you are willing to feel awkward and uncomfortable when you’re trying something new.”

He’s right — think about the first time you rode a bike. It was scary, right? But now biking is probably a breeze. The same goes for anything in life — once you embrace that self-doubt as a feeling that will go away eventually, and one that actually marks progress, you can take baby steps out of your comfort zone to tackle new challenges.

Failure is an option

Paralyzing self-doubt often springs from the fear of failure. However, the most successful people of our time have found failure to be an important stepping stone on the path to success.

Take a page from massively successful tech entrepreneur Elon Musk, for example. When working on SpaceX, he said, “Failure is an option here. If things are not failing, you are not innovating enough.”

By being practical and accepting that failure will happen at some point in everyone’s career, you can stop being crippled by its inevitability and keep trucking forward instead.

Focus on what you can control

Sheryl Sandberg, the COO of Facebook and author of Lean In, gave a commencement speech at Barnard College encouraging the graduating class to not be stopped by self-doubt or forces we can’t control.

“Let the barriers you face — and there will be barriers — be external, not internal. Fortune does favor the bold, and I promise that you will never know what you’re capable of unless you try.”

When you’re an entrepreneur, there are a million and a half things that will be completely out of your control every day, no matter how much effort you put in. Instead of getting paralyzed by this, take a tip from Sandberg and only focus on what you can control.

Look at those other times you had self-doubt

We’ve all encountered unfounded self-doubt over a past task, and then gone on to tackle that project with flying colors.

That’s why it’s helpful to record those achievements that were thought “impossible” and revisit them when self-doubt creeps up again.

Psychologists call this journaling, and it’s a proven way to boost your self-image and get rid of the feelings of Impostor Syndrome.

Seek the support of others

Seeking the support of others can help flesh out those fantastic traits that you’re having trouble recognizing. As Oprah Winfrey wisely said, “A mentor is someone who allows you to see the hope inside yourself.”

A mentor who has walked in the same shoes as you can prove beyond valuable in these cases, so don’t be afraid to reach out to others. Mentors often have a larger vision for us than we have for ourselves, and their confidence inspires us to reach higher than we could have imagined on our own.

Make self-doubt work for you

Believe it or not, not all self-doubt is a bad thing. A healthy, manageable amount of it can be valuable in keeping you sharp, focused, and inventive.

Actor Denzel Washington was quoted as saying, “That last five minutes before you go on that first [Broadway] preview, if you don’t have that what the hell am I doing here [feeling], if you don’t have that, then they say it’s time to quit.”

So let self-doubt motivate you to keep improving on the things you do best, while staying humble in the process. You don’t have to let it bring you down.

Own your accomplishments

Amanda Palmer, punk musician, TED speaker, and author of the The Art of Asking, said it best when she wrote, “When you’re an artist, nobody ever tells you or hits you with the magic wand of legitimacy. You have to hit your own head with your own handmade wand.”

In today’s busy world, others often won’t take the time to shower you with praise. So just like Palmer, you need to become your own best cheerleader. Don’t be afraid to give yourself a pat on the back for all the great things you’re doing. No award or promotion will make you feel confident about your professional contributions unless you can admire yourself first.

Hope you liked this article, if you did then feel free to share it or support my work either through a Donation via Paypal or through Patreon, thank you!

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Discovering Intentions to Improve your Personal Life

How to discover your intentions:

Good intentions are the ultimate choice of improving your life. If you have bad intentions, it is a sign you are filled with greed, envy, hate and so on. You want all these negative influences out of your life. Intentions are powerful. Intentions tell others where our goals are heading. It is our purpose. Intentions are our motive that helps us to achieve our objectives.

To learn your intentions you must put forth effort. Sometimes you will feel grouchy, and grit your teeth, yet as you continue to learn you will see a light at the end of the tunnel. So what if some of your intentions are bad. Welcome to reality, humanity and imperfection. Yet, you can change those bad intentions to good thoughts. The key to find your intentions is to consider discovering. Acquire the determination to reach for the stars, learn about you, decide what you want and move ahead. Take the action so that you can develop healthier thoughts, habits, behaviors etc that guide you to success.

The system of entry:
It always helps a person to write down their intentions. When you enter your intentions on paper, it helps you to discover you. Many people do not like to write, however if you keep a journal you can look back later to see your growth stage. It only takes a few minutes daily to jot down your feelings, thoughts, ideas and so on.

Accessing your interests and strengths within:

To access your interests, first you have to sit down and consider what you want. Once you decide what you want, you will need to write a plan, set goals and take action. Move to get what you want. To access your strengths, test your abilities and skills. What can you do best? How can you use your skills and abilities to improve your personal life?

Once you access your inner you, you can move to set your own standard of living. Do not live for others; rather learn to live for you. As you move ahead, explore your vocation paths. Do you see you in the future enjoying the job you love? Do you see you in the future working at the same company going nowhere? If you see yourself stuck, check your options to find a way to better your situation. You can start by identifying the jobs that peek your interest. Once you discover what you want to do, set up strategies to achieve your goals. Take action and move ahead.

How it is done:
Discover you and what options you have available. Pull up resources. In fact, build resources. Resources are the key that unlocks the doors to success. Check your intentions. What is the ideal vocation for you? Pull up your assets and use them to your advantage. Do a job search to help you find a new career that makes you happy. Always follow through with your plans. Never give up and demand results.

To achieve your goals discover your wants.

Take action by recording your specific needs and wants. Review the inner pictures you develop and listen to the voices that tell you how you can improve your personal life. We have cute little thingy ma-jigger that tells us when we do wrong. Learn to train your conscious to live healthier. We have another cutie inside us, which is called instincts. Learn to re-establish your instincts and listen. Listening is the key to help you improve your personal life. Learn how to recognize your bodies needs also.

Hope you liked this article, if you did then feel free to share it or support my work either through a Donation via Paypal or through Patreon, thank you!

P.S. If you liked this post then you’ll like my books as well. You can get them on Amazon.

Competence Leading to Improve Personal Life

Do you have the competence to improve your everyday living and overall humane existence, or do you lack this quality? To improve personal living you have to find competence to take control. Our life is the personal way we as humans life. It is our way of making choices, which contributes to our person. In life we have inner coaches, counselors, etc that help us to achieve in life. We also have helpful experts in the world who will take the time to help those who find it difficult to help self. You have many options and resources available to you.

How to use competence:
Competence is earned. You must learn how to build competence to use it. A person with competence will take what they learn and use it to solve different situations in their life. They will make what they learn second to the first nature they intend to acquire. A competent person always sees the new light at the end of each tunnel.

When a person has competence, he or she feels joyful. A joyful person will consider each incident, experience etc in life as something they can learn from, as well this person will not allow bad weigh him or her down. The person will take the bad, see new light and continuing learning from his or her mistakes.

We hear bad news each day. The US is battling hard with other countries. This is out of our control. Therefore, we must see the new light. For instance, you can say “I do not have control over the world, yet I have control over my actions.” Once you see that you can only change you, you will live happier and free of chaos.

You will need to learn how to suspend judgments of self and others. You are not the Man in control. Only one spiritual being has the right to call judgment down on anyone. Let this Man take the weight on His shoulders. You may need to pray often to cease judging self and others. since this is a common problem, we face in the world. It is habitually seen in nearly everyone you meet.

It is ok to have opinions, but when you do not have facts to support your claims, why speak. Too many times people suspect, offer opinions, speculate, or jump to conclusions, which has caused major problems in the world. If you do not have facts behind you, or to support what you say, shut up. Allow someone else in the world to make the next mistake.

If you want to live happier, you will need to build your energy. To build energy you will need to eat proper, exercise and take good care of you. You will need to associate with positive people and learn to help others as well as yourself. The more effort you put forth, the more you will get back from your efforts.

Next, you want to consider your health. Frequent doctor visits, exercise, eating right and avoiding harmful chemicals and substances are a start to bettering your health.

Once you get your health in check, you can move to build self-awareness. In fact, you should have a degree of this already built, since you needed it to see how to improve your overall life. Self-awareness is the process of evaluating self. When you can sit back and look at you, you have self-awareness. What can I do to change bad habits. How do my bad habits help me. Remember, laugh as you evaluate yourself to keep from going insane.

Hope you liked this article, if you did then feel free to share it or support my work either through a Donation via Paypal or through Patreon, thank you!

P.S. If you liked this post then you’ll like my books as well. You can get them on Amazon.