How do you actually be outcome independent?
Stoicism is Greco-Roman philosophy with the goal of accepting reality as the key to inner peace. Essentially, Stoicism is a philosophy of maintaining Frame. I’ll focus now on how to use it to become Outcome Independent.
When confronted with a problem, ask yourself if it is something outside your control, or in your control. If the problem is outside your control, then conclude that since there is nothing you can do about it, you shouldn’t worry.
Accept that, and move on to other things. There is no point in wasting energy if you can’t change the outcome.
On the other hand, if something is under your control, then, there is also no reason to worry because you can deal with the problem – it’s under your control.
That is all there is to staying calm when facing problems: if something is outside your control, don’t waste energy on it. If something is inside your control, figure out what you can do about it, work hard at it, and that’s it.
The Stoics noticed that there is one power that you have to conquer all these problems. This post is about that power. This is power nobody can ever take away from you. This power is the key to having Frame, Outcome Independence, passing all the shit tests, and getting all the sex you want.
“Man is disturbed not by things, but by the views he takes of them.” – Epictetus
We have the power to redefine problems. Others might try to define problems for us, but we should always reject that, it gives away that power. Always define the problem in terms of what is under your control, and what isn’t.
This way you always have Outcome Independence.
By worrying about the outcome, you waste valuable mental resources on something outside your control, denying those mental resource to very thing that needs them — your work effort.
This creates self-sabotage. Wanting something too badly leads to needy, desperate behavior and rash decisions that undermine your very goal. If you are outcome-dependent, you are much more likely to quit half-way through a project when you don’t get the results you expected as soon as you expected.
Examples of outcome independence:
- When selling your house, focus your attention on the process of selling, not the final sale price. You have no control over the final sale price, but you do control how many ads you run.
- When losing weight, focus your attention on the process of going to the gym, not your weight. You have no control over how many pounds you shed, but you do control how consistently you go to the gym.
- When writing a book, focus on your writing, not the amount of copies you’ll sell. You have no control over how many books you’ll sell, but you do control the depth of your research.
What happens when you become outcome independent
1. You will become fearless
By being outcome independent you will naturally pursue things that you were once scared of. That business that you’ve always wanted to start? You are ready now, because if it doesn’t work out then who cares? You don’t. In fact, you do even not think about failure at all, you just commit.
You don’t always have time to be a perfectionist and learn before you start. Sometimes, by continuous learning and no action you get into a state of ‘analysis paralysis’ and you never do anything. It’s a form of procrastination, and now that you are outcome independent, you can begin to take action without fear.
2. You will make better decisions
Without being emotionally affected by outcomes, you will have the mental clarity and the perspective to choose the best path to success.
3. You will have more romantic & sexual options
Desperation is a powerful deterrent. Outcome independence is the complete opposite of that.
Being outcome independent is almost like playing hard to get, but in reality, you’re not actually playing. You don’t care if the relationship goes anywhere, and people want what they can’t have. Being outcome independent makes you seem a bit more difficult to capture.
4. Lower stress levels and less anxiety
5. More Confidence
By redefining the problem such that the burden is on you, it means you can’t blame others anymore for your lack of success, you must face the challenge, you have no excuses now. This is what is so hard about this: it just reminds you are always the captain, even when you are drunk.
You are the only person that defines the problems in your life. You do so in such a way you that the burden of overcoming challenges becomes all yours. You don’t blame others, you don’t beg others. But you put all your energy on solving that problem you defined and waste none in worrying about what you can’t control.
Most people can’t do this. But then again most people are fucking retards so no surprise there.
By learning outcome independence, you also accept that you will encounter rejection and failure on your path towards success.
You accept that sometimes plans go another way. More importantly, be flexible in adapting to the situation and learn from those mistakes. Over time, you also learn to view every challenge as an opportunity.
Acceptance of an unpleasant situation helps you to rebound from that failure and continue moving on much faster.
Accept that failure and rejection are good things. It also teaches us that at times a situation is out of our control. Being risk adverse prevents you from taking any action towards accomplishing your goals.
Accepting that failure and rejection are good things means that freeing yourself from the victim mentality, wherein instead of blaming others for your past and present mistakes and conditions, you now accept that you—and you alone—are solely responsible for the crap that happens in your life.
Redefine problems always in such a way that you take the responsibility for them and fully control their outcome. This places the burden of overcoming challenges on YOU, but also, frees you from having to beg others to do what you want. This is Outcome Independence. This creates attraction. This is masculine and this is part of becoming a good leading figure.
As always thanks for reading and until next time.
P.S. If you liked this post then you’ll like my books as well. You can get them on Amazon.